Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why didn't the black man brush his teeth today? Because he was already too late for work.

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

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Knock Knock *no answer* Knock Knock *Genevieve enters the house with curiosity and is later charged with Breaking and Entering*

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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your a towel.

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Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

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nine...eleven

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Women

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops