Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

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What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

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Women's rights.

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What do you call a black man who graduated med school? A doctor

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A jew go out of a bar

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Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

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If there are 500 bricks in an airplane and one falls out how many are there in he plane? 499. Name 3 steps to get a Elephant in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2. Put the Elephant in the fridge 3. Close the fridge Name 4 steps to get an Deer in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2.Take the Elephant out of the fridge 3. Put the Deer in the fridge 4. Close the fridge The Lion King is having a birthday party. Every animal came, besides one. Who was it? The Deer. Because hes trapped in the Fridge. The Deer manages to escape the fridge, and hes running late. he encounters Crocodile lake. How will he cross it? He will swim through it because the Crocodiles are at the Lion Kings birthday. Then suddenly, The Deer dies. How? The Brick hit him.

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Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

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Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

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I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

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Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

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Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

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don't look behind you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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