What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

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What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

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Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

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What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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