Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops