A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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penis. nuff said.

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Whats the answer to life? im not sure

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops