-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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