What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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Justin Bieber

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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