A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

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Lacrosse

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Knock Knock Come in.

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

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what do u call a hobo name Max Max

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Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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a drunk man got 3 beers and a 5 whiskys

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What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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An rich man walks into a ghetto and buys something for 1 million dollars. what store was he in? he wasn't in a store,he got robbed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops