Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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A blind man walks into a library.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What's black and doesn't work? Half of Detroit.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops