Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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they told me not to write here but i did

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops