What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

someone called someone else a frog

1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

what's worse than a joke about the holocaust? the holocaust.

Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...