Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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