roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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knock,knock you suck

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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