why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

Baby Seal walks into a club.

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Heeeheeeerrrrrrrrrrr

Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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