whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

why did the circus boy not do his homework? because he was in a coma.

Q: How do you find the population of Mexico? A: Take a census

There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

What is worse then not being able to drink your vodka right away A black guy drinking for you

Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

why did logan cross the road? to get raped by his father again

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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