What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

karn chevalier

hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

What do two black guys do when they walk into the convienent store with masks? Buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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