Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

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Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops