Ubisoft presents a game by ubisoft

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got revenge And you got big boobs. :3 Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad poet Now i'm dead. O_O

Knock knock. Who's there?

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

Two apples are hanging from a tree. They are both picked, sold, taken home, washed, and enjoyed by a family of three.

What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

what's the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage!

Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

(In a job interview) Interviewer: Name a time when you've failed sometime Me: I failed an HIV test last June, anything else?

You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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