Two birds fly onto a bench. They cherp 3 times and sit there enjoying the nice weather.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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what is the difference between a a person and a book? people can walk

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

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if a fat guy in a red suit comes into your house on christmas. its not santa your about to get raped from chewy(:

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Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

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A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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Is J.P. dumb? Yes

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What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

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If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

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What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

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GONNA

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A man named Carl walks into a bar and sees another man named Ed who has purple skin and is holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other. Carl approaches Ed and asks, "Why is your skin purple and why are you holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other?" Ed replies stating, "Well its actually a pretty funny story. I was sailing near cape cod and a saw a large whale jump out of the water, and that gave me a really good idea. So I sailed home immediately and wrote a very detailed novel about my days in Vietnam. The book was a success and I was able to make a large amount of money. However, unfortunately I became addicted to cocaine and wasted all of my money and had to live on the streets. Since then, I have cleaned up my act and am working again and have a house. I decided to treat myself to a night out and so I came here and painted myself purple. Then, I found this chinchilla and policeman's helmet on the floor and decided to hold onto it until I find the owner. Now that I think about it, that story isn't very funny. I apologize." Carl then accepted the apology and the two had a drink together and are still good friends today.

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

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Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops