Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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four score and seven years ago. . sharks with frickn laser beams attached to their FRICKeN HEADs.

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What is worse than a worm in you're apple? Two worms in you're apple.

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Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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womens rights

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

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hi

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What do you get when you cross a bus full of cancer patients and a train full of children? A very sad train accident.

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops