A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

If i open this door you can go trough it

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

shammmm is a lesbian.

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

How High is a Chinese man

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

they told me not to write here but i did

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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