Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

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Q.Whats the differents between justin bieber and a girl A.Nothing

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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I wonder what happen to John? Oh John I know what happen to him. What happened to him then? He was playing on the bridge and fell off on accident. Is he okay? Damn women of coarse he is not okay!!!

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

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What do you call a something with no limbs? a snake

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya? ..Umm i'm sorry :/ I'm not gay!... I'm into chicks...you know?!

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don't know. The woodchuck won't chuck wood.

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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