A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

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Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

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have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

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There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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The cream, it is coming

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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