What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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If a llama walks into a jewelry store and a carrot has no feathers, then why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a car because chickens are simple creatures and don't understand the complex rules of the road.

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

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Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

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what did the man say to his wife? I love you

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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Poker? I barely even know her.

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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your a vagina says you, you're a tit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops