What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

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Roses are red pineapple is yellow I'll shove your head up my ass so you can eat some marshmallows!

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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Sharvil has aids 4 times

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

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Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops