Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

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mark is religion

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What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

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Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't, he died in the middle of this task.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops