A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

i like it in the mouth

why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

whats worse than a kane nothing

Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

So a blonde walks into a wall...

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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