What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

thumb_up thumb_down +20

how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

thumb_up thumb_down +20

When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call white trash Garbage

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

People are a lot like slinkies. Not really good for anything, but still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops