A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's There ........................ ........................................... I hate doorbell ditchers

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your face

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You know what's natural? Bears.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is worse than the Holocaust? Women's sports

thumb_up thumb_down -12

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

David Copperfield (the magician you moron). "I will now perform my greatest act yet!" Everyone applauded as he put the screaming woman (for effects you know) into the first end of the meatgrinder, and surprisingly grinded meat came out the other side! And the woman? She disappeared... forever! *applause* Moral: BRAVO! BRAVO!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

American: Hi im American Hispanic: Oh hey

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops