A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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An Italian leaves the mofia

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? About 144 licks but everyone gets different answers because we all lick lollipops differently.

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Why did the blonde turn red Because some one lit her on fire

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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roses are red leather is black when god made you he was smoking crack

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Why did the boy cry? Because his mother died of a heart attack.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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Why was the priest lying still? Because his son shot him

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What do chickens, pictures and babies have in common? Nothing.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

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Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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roses are red pickles are green i like your legs and whats in between

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What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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