- Anti Joke

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

A blonde woman with her son are in walmart , as they approach the food and beverage section , they see a mexican man looking at the eggs. The man asks for help from the blonde woman about egg quality. She says ABD Eggs are the best so the mexican guy chooses that. Upon leaving the little boy points to the mexicans guys hat and shouts "ALIENS !" the mother gets really embarassed and shouts at her son for his behaviour and says it is not right. The mum gets relieved that she say that the mexican guy could not hear since he was listening to music. Upon the way out the mum spots a purplish liquid dripping out of the mexican guys hair. She asks him and he replies "Its the hair gel". The blonde and son nods and continues on their lives. - AK

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

"What would Jesus do?" "Form a religion, get nailed to a cross, and become a martyr to millions."

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

A man walks into a bar He is now in the emergency room suffering from deep lacerations to the forehead as well as a bloody nose.

Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Why did the girl stop smoking? Because her mum asked her to.

Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

what is big and white? Your Mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

Roses are red, violets are blue. my Mom is a hooker.

What's worse than getting tripped? Getting shot.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

Eh yo Sean u mr. Kingston Hey, how are you doing?

If you give a hobo a stick he might poke u with it

why did the blonde get caught shop lifting? she wasnt a very good theif

Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.