What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

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Your mother is so fat.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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Why can't antelopes fly? Because they can't

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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Tyler: Why'd the monkey fall out of a tree? Donnie: who's there Tyler: dude this isn't a knock knock joke...

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how did the man die from falling out of the window his angry x- friend pushed him.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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What do u call a bunch of black dudes burried from their necks down? Afro-turf

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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