How to have a cheap party in just 5 steps: 1. Buy 100 McDonald's burgers and give everyone food poisoning 2. Bring out that black serial killer's mask you've been working on. 3. Bring out that sharp knife. 4. Slit everyone's throats. 5. Dance.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why is it interesting to watch your mum shower? It's Not, its sick you pervert

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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what do you call the head-less man sitting on your porch? By what ever his name is!!

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The WPGA tour

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

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What do I hate? people

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

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How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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McDonald. It's run by Lawers

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What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction? That you need to be more specific.

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The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops