roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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Your mother lives so loosely that she has several terminal diseases and only has 3 weeks to live.

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what?

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ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

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robin, get in the car.

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Hey, I just met you. Nice to meet you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

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Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

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roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

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What the man from the arapahoe tribe say to the mexican who was living in a trash bag? You should try a hotel room. They comfortably sleep 67-493 mexicans.

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave Smith. Oh, hey Dave. Come in.

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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