how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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your dad called night and told me your grandpa died.

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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MOTHER OF GOD! Someone get this horse out of here!

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

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Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

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Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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An american man, chinese man, black man, and a Mexican man walk into a bar. The american man says i want to show you guys a trick, so they go to the empire state building and the american man jumps off the side and comes back up alive. He tells them i will do it one more time, watch closely. So he jumps off and comes back alive. The american guy tells the chinese man to do it. So the chinese guy jumps off and dies. Then the american guy tells the mexican to jumps off, sonhe does it. The mexican man dies and the black guy is told to do it and he is afraid, but still does it, he dies. The american man goes back to the bar and the barkeep says "Superman you can be a real dick when your drunk!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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