What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

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What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

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An early jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody.

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A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

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What causes floods? Too much water.

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What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

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A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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So a female ant walks into a bar... and someone steps on it.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Women's rights.

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knock knock who's there aids

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When is a door not a door? Never. a door is always a door. it cannot be anything else.

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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What do you call a black priest? Someone devoted to the word of god

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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