3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

What do you get wen u cross a cat and a walrus? Two animals with very different life styles.

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

Who is the fiercist Raptor of them all? Matt Daly

women rights

And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

What did one computer say to the other? 100111010100100111001010010001110101110010100010101011010011010010111000010101100100100100001101010000011111010010011010100110101001010100101010101010100101011010010010101010110010110010100100010101010101010

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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