Q: Why can't Eric drive a car? A: Because Eric is a rock

why the woman scream when she arrived at her surprise party? Everyone was dead!

One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

pickle juice?

Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

Why did the guy fly? Because he steped on a landmine

how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

Robin, get in the batmobile.

What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Spell: “This word”

how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

Land Rovers

What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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