What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

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Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

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brainfart

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Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie? Tickets were sold out.

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Strawberries!

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People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

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what do you get when you cross a man and a horse? Collision

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Whats better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

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whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

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What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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