What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

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911 joke ? now thats just plane rude.

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The Bible

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What did Bush say to Obama was elected? I'm going to have you assassinated.

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a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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The BCS

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

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Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

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Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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A Irish man walks our of a bar

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and chess? Michael Jackson's dead.

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If a prisoner got one visitor who would he ask to see An Eskimo

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Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

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Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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Whats worse than 3 black people? 4 Black people

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops