Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two Jews were fighting over a penny and then they realizde that they may be made fun of for this and quickly stopped.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

press a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l feel like a pianist

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?!" ...Two days later, both of the cannibals became very ill with food poisoning. Always ensure meat is cooked thoroughly before eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An Irish man walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There was once a boy named Swan, But then they built Autobahn.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

watashi no namae wa ramune desu

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

peter charastabopouloulous

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Chuck Norris' punch is so powerful that is falls on the downward slope of the bell curve for punch force of adult males.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo momma's so fat, that she was put in this joke

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do you call a Mexican who gets his car stolen. A: Pablo

thumb_up thumb_down +2

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops