What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

I did your mom..... A favor..... By making you..... A sandwich...... With mustard.....

How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

Chuck Norris doesn't do pushups, his personal trainer designed a regiment for him that didn't involve them.

What do video games and school have in common? Nothing, nobody likes school

What is big, white, and hurts when it falls from the sky? A FRIDGE

Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Three males walked into a bar. one of them was a kangaroo.

what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

69. Yeah- that's my street address.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't because it had died from an uncaring mother and father that dumped it's corps on the side of the highway.

What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

You're mom is so black... that she is most likely of African Descent

a black guy leaves prison

What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

why?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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