Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Fat? Jesse Z

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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