What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

thumb_up thumb_down +7

http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

thumb_up thumb_down +1

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops