What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

9/11 my birthday

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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