how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

How many fairies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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