What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Apple hates Blackberry.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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i'm hard

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops