What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

How old are you? 7

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

whats the difference between and black guy and a bench? a bench can supoort a family

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am ADD Bird

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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