Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

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why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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A man died.

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Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

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a black man pays his child support

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What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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