I just threw up..In my pants.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

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How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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