Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

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Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

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roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops