Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

A man walks into a bar. He is now passed out on the ground. (TD)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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