What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

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Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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I was walking down the street the other day And I pushed a child under a bus

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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womans having rights.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops