What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

vitamin c

What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she died of pancreatic cancer.

q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

123 f*ck off

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...